The
Single Speak Decoders
The Single Speak Decoders are part of Teresa
Mannix's hilarious new electronic book, Virtually
Yours: the Single Girl's Guide to Finding Love in Cyber Space. Use the link to read
more extracts or buy the book.
What
HE really means:
- House trained - Im sick and tired
of having to clean up after myself.
- Easygoing: Im a total slob and I leave the toilet seat up.
- Relaxed: My idea of a date is sitting on the sofa with the remote control and watching the
football.
- Looking for someone to spoil (1): Chocolates, flowers and romantic dinners while were
dating, then you get to spoil me for the rest of your life.
- Kids OK: MY kids, not YOUR kids.
- Bigger than his job: At work, Im a failure.
- Open minded: Id eventually like to have sex with all your girlfriends as well as with
you. Later, maybe even with your pets
.
- Likeable: I appeal to pets and small children.
- Generous: Ill bear the ENTIRE fuel cost when we go out in my car.
- Lets chat. Not on the phone, silly. Lets find an Internet chat
room and type at each other.
Read more of HIS Speak Decoders.
What
SHE really means:
- Bubbly: Dumb
- Curvy: Fat
- Caring: If you
dont want me Ill kill myself.
- Lonely: I have really
bad breath.
- Young-at-heart: I look
old
- Independent: Im
a hard-nosed bitch
- Feminine: You can pay
for everything
- Sensitive: Neurotic
- Loves cooking: Ill
boil the eggs while you remodel the kitchen.
- Open minded: Desperate
enough to do it with all your friends
- Happy: On medication
- Fun Loving(1): HIV
Positive
- Focused: Ill
keep calling until you change your number
- Available: Nobody
wants me
Read more of HER Speak Decoders.
Copyright Teresa Mannix 1998.
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